I dream of…

I dream of hair…literally.  This morning I awoke practically euphoric from last nights dream, the second I’ve had in recent days.  My hair although very short was thick and cute and I can still recall how it felt to squirt a big glob of gel into my hands and spread it through my hair.  I even had enough length near my ears to mold a subtle flip with the gel holding it in place.  It was a wonderful dream!

As blissful and clear as it was to me, it’s even more exciting to know that I’m gradually getting closer to that actual day.  Each morning I survey my head in the mirror and study the faint blonde hairs that cover my head, and every evening as I sit on the couch or type at the computer I find that I always have one hand incessantly running over my head, a strange habit that many times I’m not even aware of.  I’m surprised Mike hasn’t subtly suggested that I keep my hands folded on my lap to give my hair a rest from the stroking, but he knows how excited I am for it to return.

And I’ve been slowly braving the great outdoors with my noggin!  Margarita and chips were calling my name last Friday and I just couldn’t bear to put on any head covering so I forced a confident smile and went for it.  As we walked down the sidewalk nearing the entrance, I actually noticed my body slowing and beginning to fall in behind Mike’s stride instead of walking beside him.  I clearly wanted to hide.  So I picked up the pace alongside him, broadened my smile even more to mime confidence and as he opened the restaurant door for me, all of the happy-hour patrons turned in unison and gave me a good long look.

Even though I obviously look different, I used my smile as a way to convey to them that I was perfectly healthy and normal and that I had no idea what they could possibly be looking at.  And just in case, I kept a small bit of defense up to protect my fragile and exposed vulnerability, by purposely never locking eyes with anyone as we passed through the restaurant on our way to our table.  But once I was seated, I completely forgot about my obvious missing female accessory and it seemed that everyone else around me did as well.

3 Responses to “I dream of…”

  1. mike Says:

    ya…and you looked SMOKIN’ hot!!!
    love ya!

  2. Leona Says:

    You are awesome, Meg! It’s all about attitude that keeps a person going.

  3. Jenny Says:

    I have more than once passed someone in a store who has no hair, knowing they just had chemo sometime in my past. Even though I have had cancer, I find myself speachless as to what I could say to express my words of encouragement to them. If you walked into that restaurant, and some stranger wanted to say some words of enccourgement to you, what would you have enjoyed hearing? I am going to ask myself that same question. That is because I think sometimes people look and say, “How said, that person has had cancer and their heart goes out to them”. But deep down they don’t know what to say whether to offend or to encourage. I just want to learn how to be a better encourager even to strangers…so, any ideas! (I know you are thinking, yeah Jenny always has something to say, but sometimes I really don’t), or sometimes I have said the wrong things (not intenting too). I still remember telling Eric, Jason and Mike while we were dating and I was walking the golf course at Northwoods, “I can beat you guys at this game if I played”. Duh! Great first impression. But the game “looks” so easy! :0 Ok, that would be “one” example. So back to encouraging thoughts, what would encourage you today if you walked into a store and a stranger stopped you and slipped a positive comment? ~ Just curious. It will help me to encourage someoene else down the road…

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